i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize
