Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
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Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
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All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
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