you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
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