wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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