I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
