Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize