you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
