so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I understand Curling. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
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