Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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