all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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