Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize