this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
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