Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
