thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
