This girl is more easily done than said...
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
