so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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