Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
