I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
