Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
My cat gives me a boner
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Randomize
