absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
