i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Everclear isn't food dammit
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Randomize
