Welp...herpes.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
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It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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