im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
