Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
