Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
as a side note pls kill me
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