Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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