I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
