btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
barbara walters just said penis...
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Randomize
