Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
