it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
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