I would go down on you faster than GM stock
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize