Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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