i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
