So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
