i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
This is classic penis vs brain.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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