Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
Well my cheeks are red now
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.