He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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