I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize