Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
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