I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
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