We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
