yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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