Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
it's not cheating when I paid for it
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
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