I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
