Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize