ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
