sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
