Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
