went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
