tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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